New Jersey Criminal Defense Lawyers

The Psychological Stages Leading To Divorce

Divorce can understandably be an emotional roller coaster. But you should know that you are not alone. The feelings leading up to the decision to divorce can be seemingly overwhelming. This article will detail what many divorce clients feel from the time they begin thinking about divorce through the divorce proceedings, and finally, after divorce.

For many people the first feeling they experience is denial. Despite repeated arguments and general unhappiness, many people deny the fact that their marriage is not working until significant problems have arisen and the marriage is well on its way to failure. In fact, some people go on denying the failure of their marriage until the other spouse files for divorce. As hard as it may seem, it is important to try to make an objective assessment of the problems occurring in a marriage and determine the appropriate steps to take, whether it be an attempt at reconciliation or proceeding towards divorce.

A second feeling that often coincides with the denial is anger. This anger can manifest itself through arguments with the spouse, or can have a toll on other areas of an individual's life such as work, school, or relationships with children or family. It is also not uncommon for parties contemplating divorce to experience some level of depression.

Eventually parties begin to experience acceptance as they work through the stages of divorce. One crucial step towards acceptance is understanding that the feelings and problems being experienced are normal for a person going through a divorce. Once a person understands that their feelings are common, and not abnormal, they begin to feel like they have the strength to move on to the next stage of their life. The amount of time it takes before this realization occurs varies from person to person. For some, they accept the facts and move on well before the divorce is even finalized. For others it may take years to begin accepting the circumstances of divorce and begin building a new life. In the end however, most people find themselves in a better place once the proceedings are finalized.


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©2012 The Law Offices of Jef Henninger, Esq.